Adoption Adventures in Kazakhstan

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Life is good! December 23, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 3:14 pm

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Sasha came around the corner the other day wearing these glasses and a big grin.   

 

Dinner with Grandpa Peter & Grandma Stephanie, Christmas Tree Hunting December 2, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 10:26 pm

Dad & Steph prepare dinner for the Rafael, Karen, Molli, Steve & Kids; Annika, Katia & Sasha prepare to decorate the Christmas tree; Molli, Katia, Annika, Sasha and Fletcher pause for a break in the midst of the hunt; Sasha with Santa

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Sasha’s baptism November 28, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 3:45 am

Sasha got baptised on Sunday!  We’ve attached a few pictures of the big day, first of his Minnesota Godparents, Uncle Ken and Aunt Jackie, then of Sasha on Aunt Jackie’s lap, then Sasha with his Mom, Dad and sisters in front of the baptismal font, and finally getting baptised.

Steve 

Uncle Ken and Aunt Jackie, Sasha’s Minnesota GodparentsSasha with Aunt Jackie

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Sasha getting baptized

 

Rocking our world September 9, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 3:04 am

We haven’t posted for a while because, well, it’s everything we can do just to keep up with Sasha. Whether he’s sampling the dog or cat food, rearranging his sisters’ things, jumping into the pool while we’re not looking, tumbling down the stairs, or just filling drinking a cup with hand soap and then water and then drinking the solution (who knew you could make thousands of bubbles with just your mouth, without blowing thru one of those little wands?), this guy is a handful. And we (at least Molli and I — the girls are less sure) feel like the luckiest people on earth.

Here are a few photos from Sasha’s first month here. He has finally agreed to wear a swimming suit when running through the sprinkler or swimming in the pool, much to the relief of his sisters.

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Reconnecting with Sasha; A week in Almaty August 1, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 1:51 am

Hey Everyone,

This is Katia, Annika and Steve, attempting to fill Molli’s big blog-writing shoes as she spends a week with Sasha in Almaty.

Molli arrived last Friday morning in Almaty and then met up with Sasha and Masha Friday night. We had wondered how Sasha would handle leaving the orphanage. We wondered if he would cling to the only life he’s known, the only friends he’s had, and the only caregivers who have nurtured him. As it turns out, when Masha picked him up at the orphanage on Friday to take him to Almaty, he took her hand, started walking, and never looked back.

Molli, Sasha and Masha spent Friday evening together, and then Masha left early the next morning, leaving Molli and the Sash-meister alone to figure out how they were going to spend the week ahead of them before coming home.

The breakfast buffet guests on Saturday morning witnessed a funny scene. Molli got Sasha a plate of food and set it on the table in front of Sasha while she went to get some food for herself. When she got back, Sasha had already eaten half of his food. Not only that, but he had eaten half of his hard-boiled egg, including the shell! He looked up at her with a smile, flakes of egg shell dangling from his lips. Figuring that some juice would help Sasha wash down the shell, Molli gave him a sip. Unfortunately, a little went the wrong way, and back out it went . . . along with the egg and egg shell, splattered across the table.

I get the sense from Molli that Sasha would be immensely entertaining if you weren’t trying to overcome an 11 hour time change and a very difficult foreign language, and keep him out of trouble. He likes to pretend the bathroom is a phone booth. On the first night in the hotel, Molli and Masha overheard him saying on his toy cellphone, “Hello papa, it’s me. I’m here. Come get me.” Then after he had gone quiet for a few minutes, Molli went into the bathroom and found that he had disconnected the shower hose from the plumbing in the shower.

Since that morning, Mol and Sasha have spent a lot of quality time together, filling their days with meals, bathroom breaks, walks, an occasional tantrum, an even more occasional nap (Sasha has a very strong preference for napping only in the stroller, while his mother is showing him around Almaty), and a couple visits to the U.S. Embassy. On Monday, they went to the Embassy for Sasha’s physical. Mol was a little concerned after she saw two children come out of the doctor’s office crying, but Sasha got thru the exam, including the blood draw, without a fuss.

Tuesday, they returned to the Embassy for their exit interview, which went off without a hitch, so they were ready to come home . . . if they could get a flight. We didn’t think they’d be able to, because there’s only one flight per day from Almaty to Amsterdam (where their connecting flight was leaving from), and we had learned earlier from Northwest that no spots were available on the Wednesday KLM flight out of Almaty (NWA doesn’t fly out of Almaty). Mol was pleasantly surprised to hear that they could in fact get seats on the flight out of Almaty, potentially getting them home two days early! Unfortunately, though there was room on the KLM flight out of Almaty, Northwest didn’t have any space on any of its flights from Amsterdam to Minnesota. What’s more, because Sasha didn’t have a U.S. passport yet (just a Kazakhstan passport with a visa to travel to the U.S.), he wouldn’t be able to leave the airport for the two days but instead would have to wait in the terminal for his connecting flight on Friday. So . . . they’ll be leaving Almaty Friday morning, and getting to Minnesota Friday mid-afternoon.

We just talked to Mol and Sasha (and Nana Mary, too) through the miracle of Skype. Sasha usually answers the phone, and after I’ve exhausted my vocabulary by using the three phrases I know (“how are you?”, “say ‘awesome’” and “do you want M&M’s?”) and asked where his mom is, he puts the receiver to her ear and promptly begins pressing all of the buttons on the phone. He got back on the phone toward the end of our conversation tonight and, since Molli had told us about how she had bought him a “horse” (really a camel, but let’s not split hairs), asked him where his horse was. So of course, he put the phone to the horse’s ear . . .

We hope all is well with you. Thanks for your support.

Cheers,

Katia, Annika and Steve

 

 

 

We Are Back July 16, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 4:48 pm

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Our Version of American (Kazakh) Gothic–the end of our time in Petropavlovsk

Okay, I can’t stop. We have been home for a week and as I was going through the 155 photos that were taken in our last days in Kaz, I realized I have to resurrect the blog. There are too many cute pictures of Sasha and his gang, as well as the interesting and enchanting aspects of Kazakh culture we experienced. How could we deprive you of all that? I will post at least two more times before I leave to go retrieve our young man. I leave MN on Wed July 25, arrive in KAZ Friday July 27, then do paperwork with Sasha and will return to MN Friday August 3. Read and enjoy!

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Writing and Crying . . . the July 3 Blog Creation

So, after the emotional July 3, we faced the emotional July 4 . . . our last day with Sasha in Petro. We had planned a party for his group, which was a good distraction, but balloons and tissue paper, while fascinating to a two year old, can only distract adults for a short period of time. Steve and I knew we were flying away from Sasha on this day, and the sugar coating of the party didn’t help the bitter pill of leaving go down very easily.

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In preparation for the party we had gotten gifts of developmental toys for Sasha’s group, as well as balloons (possibly more interesting than the developmental toys), a new LOUD truck, and snack (including Teddy Grams) for his gang. We also had gift bags for all the caregivers and a photo album of the group for the group. Needless to say, we were a bit overloaded with bags as we entered the BH.

As we staggered up the exterior stairs we could hear the wailing of a kido on the interior stairs. There were caregiver voices talking calmly and a certain amount of kid noise in general. When we had rounded the corner and headed up the stairs to Sasha’s house, we encountered his family on their way down the stairs to a walk . . . they had forgotten about the party. So we helpfully added more chaos to the scene by having Sasha start yelling to us, “Mama! Papa! It’s my mama and my papa!” the caregivers turned the little posse around, the crying child stopped, another started, and Sasha bolted toward us and our bags of loot . . .

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Masha helped us maneuver all the bags into the Music Room where we blew up the balloons. Sasha joined us for this, and was incredibly adept at removing gifts from the bags . . . until he spied the noisy truck, pitifully camouflaged in a plastic bag. Oh, what joy a noisy truck brings! The noisiness! The truckness! The fact that it is in a bag that is tied around it! The challenge of working with it while it is still in the bag! The joy of ignoring the three adults telling you to not touch! Noisy trucks tied up in bags are a great gift indeed. . .

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By the time we had blown up the balloons and gotten those, as well as the bags, down the hall, the caregivers had their charges seated and ready for our snack. Sasha, of course, was not interested in the snack because he already knew about the noisy truck and the other bags of loot. The empty chair in their dining area is where Sash should be sitting . . . but he had gone off into party excitement mode, and no adult was going to convince him he actually had to sit down and eat.

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Just a note on Sasha’s posse . . . we had the pleasure of getting to know these little ones, and they completely rock. Each has his or her own personality, but above that, each is a toddler, who is just getting to know the world. We got to experience the sheer joy of blowing the seeds off a dandelion with them; we had intense ant watching, the fun of BIG swinging, going down the slide—on your stomach, the back and forth exchange of a wilted daisy with smiles and spa-see-bahs (thank yous) abounding. They are Sash’s siblings; the kids he helps more than harms, and with whom he has gone through his life. We love them for who they are to him, and we fear how much he will miss them.

img_30751.jpg Sasha (2), Nikita and Valya

Actually, being seven days and half way around the world from them, I am surprised at how much I miss them. There must be some teacher gene that allows us to fall in love with kids immediately. We learn how to find their strengths and challenges, then we engage with them—it is not something I am capable of turning off, and on that playground when Steve and Sasha were together, I loved playing with his group. They are each little wonders, ready to explode onto the world and it is fun to be a part of their discovery. I wish there were a way for us to keep up with what happens to them, but I don’t think that is possible . . . we will just keep them in our hearts and photo albums, and be thankful we knew them for a short time.

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On this last day together we were able to give each kid a gift to open . . . and this was an interesting thing to observe. There were kids who had no idea what to do with the brightly colored tissue paper—it was hilarious to see the gift/wrapping/balloon action. Note, I have considered bringing balloons on the planes with us as we travel home. I am not saying all the passengers would enjoy them, but I am sure Sasha would, and really, who needs to be happy on those plane rides? Me. With wine and balloons, I think we have a winning combination.

After the party we played with Sash outside as his group went out for their walk. Through out our play Steve and I kept asking Masha to explain to Sash that we needed to go home to get ready for him to come to be a part of our family. We hoped that he would understand what was going to happen, but any time you try to project actions into the future with a three year old, you are asking for misunderstanding.

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Masha tried to talk to him, and he was adorable. She would say, “Mama and Papa need to go home for a little while . . .” and he would say, “Nyet”, then she would say, “They need to get ready for you to come home,” and he would say, “Nyet.” The conversation continued along these lines and while it was sweet to have his firm denial that we would be away from him for a while, it was heartbreaking to think of the confusion that he had/has ahead of him.

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One hilarious aspect of our play time on the last day was the presence of an inflatable swimming pool. Sasha quickly learned that we would not return to the entrance of the BH to see the pool if that was what he asked. On the other hand, if he asked to go to the bathroom, we had to go by the pool, and if you are right by the pool, why not just play a bit? He needed to go to the bathroom about six times this morning. On one trip he returned to the playground with the entire bill of his hat wet. We assume he will wear a life vest at all times once he comes home.

I need to go to the bathroom . . . .

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The end of our Petro time involved negotiating our enormous phone bill with our landlord, Ivan. There was actually no negotiating, it was just, “Here is the enormous bill, I need some money”. Both Ivan and Masha were impressed with the numbers we racked up, and we were impressed with the amount of paper our bill took up.

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Sasha and Masha took us to the airport in the afternoon and stayed with us until we boarded the plane. This was very sweet of them, and a huge help because our bags were over the weight limit. On the way to Petro we paid $110 in excess baggage fees, so we were expecting something similar, but since we were with Masha, the baggage guy (who had all gold teeth—seriously I don’t think there was a natural one in there) said that if we paid him 800 tenge (~$8.00) he would get the bags loaded without using the scale. We jumped for our money and happily found a 1,000 tenge note for him . . . a huge win in the excess baggage category.

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Alexander Maier Kozachok! July 3, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — kozastan @ 9:35 am

3 July 2007

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Sasha is ours! We had our court date today, and we realize now that we may not have communicated well how chancy this bid for adoption was. Since Sasha has five siblings spread all over Russia and Kazakhstan, and the government of Kazakhstan has a strong preference against letting one sibling be adopted without the others, the odds were stacked against us.

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Despite the policy against adoptions of fewer than all siblings in a family, we went ahead with our argument that no one had adopted the entire family while they were waiting during the past two and a half years and that an adoption of all of the children together was less and less likely as time went on and the kids grew older, so that Sasha would remain in institutions his whole life if the siblings were to be “kept together”. His sisters in Kazakhstan are ages 17, 14 and 13 (in two separate orphanages that are different than Sasha’s), and he has two other siblings that were “adopted” by their father after he got his life more together, and they live in Russia.

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You may have read the blog from June 20 about his oldest sister Valya who talked with her sisters Lena and Natasha about letting him be adopted. They all agreed that it was in his best interests, so Valya came to meet him and us, and wrote a letter saying she thought he should be adopted.

Svetlana (our lawyer), Molli, Rezina (the representative of child custody), Dr. Rimma and Masha

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Court went more smoothly than anticipated—it lasted about an hour. Steve was clear and focused, I was a bit more emotional, but as always, we balanced each other out. The hard part was waiting for the judge’s decision. It was a long, hot and sweaty hour, but in the end she called us in and said the court approved of the adoption, that Sasha’s name would be Alexander Maier Kozachok and his birth city would be Petropavlovsk, and that Steve and I would be listed as his parents on his birth certificate.

Steve with the Ladies

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So, we have a son. He is everything a person could want in a child. He is smart, kind, funny, curious and . . . Sasha. This is the way this journey was supposed to culminate, and for all of you who have been on this journey with us, thank you for your love and support.

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This has been a trying year in many ways, but to be here, today, and to know that we have this gift of a child . . . the other problems fade . . . they are nothing compared to what happened today. Annika and Katia have a brother; many of you are aunts and uncles again today. And we should warn all the grandparents that Sasha is going to give all of us a run for our money.

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We saw him for a brief moment today after court and the obligatory champagne toast with the director and those who helped make this happen. As always he was a sunbeam on chubby legs. We are so lucky . . . our lives have changed forever.

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There will be a party with our friends tonight and a party with his group tomorrow morning, then a good-bye that is already breaking my heart. For now, the tears are out of joy, and sheer wonder that this child of God is joining our family. We can worry about tomorrow’s tears tomorrow.

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